miércoles, enero 31, 2007

Disconect...


Pense que era verdad esta vez
decidi dejarme sentir otra vez...
Yo creo en segundas, terceras y ultimas oportunidades...
yo ya me di muchas,
se las di a mi corazon
y esta ultima
ya se termino
fue una ilusion?
fue un sueño?
por que lo que siento no lo es
por que lo que siento duele
por que no se que sera
de todo esto
en un futuro que no se si sera distante o no...

Vi una luz alla arriba
desde el hoyo en el que estoy
que me dio esperanza
de que podia salir de ahi
que me decia que debia confiar,
que debia salir de ahi,
dejar las sombras,
sin quitarme la venda...
esa luz desaparecio derrepente
y me dejo caer de nuevo
al hoyo al que estaba
tal vez mas profundo
con el corazon hecho trizas de nuevo
con lagrimas en mis ojos,
y un dolor insoportable
me duele la cabeza...
fue el golpe?
mi corazon sangra
herido de muerte.
Si fue el golpe
ahora me estoy dando cuenta
de que cai duro
y mas profundo

Necesito desconectarme un tiempo
para asimilar mi vida
como siemre ha sido
oscura
sin vida
entre sombras
en mi hoyo
mi hogar...

Tal vez mañana siga ahi
tal vez me valla
tal vez, en un arranque de locura, desesperacion y soledad me arranque el corazon para ya no sentir mas,
tal vez muera en el intento,
tal vez solo me vuelva loca
y viva para siempre en tu recuerdo,
el recuerdo de lo que fue,
o de lo que nunca fue
o lo que valla a ser...
tal vez solo corra
corra...
y grite...
y llore...
hasta cansarme
cansarme de sentir
o hasta hacerme sentir que mi corazon se canso de seguirme y oirme gritar y llorar y halla decidido abandonarme...
Tal vez algun dia vuelva a ver esa luz...
Tal vez cuando la vuelva a ver ya no quiera salir de este agujero...
Tal vez ya este muerta para ese entonces, muerta de cualquier manera...

Ahora no lo se...
No se que haga para asimilar todo esto...
Solo se que tengo que desconectarme...
Tal vez sea una despedida,
un hasta siempre o un hasta luego...
Que mas da?
Solo quiero sanar...
Solo quiero que ya no duelas tanto...

Que ya no duela tanto...


Karma[Death]



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